How to Help Your Loved One With Their Addiction
Supporting a loved one who is dealing with addiction is not always an easy task. However, with the support of those who love and care for them, overcoming addiction can be achieved. Although every person is different, there are some general guidelines you can follow that will help out during their time of need.
Always be Prepared for Difficult Situations
As much as you want to help someone who has an addiction, you will want to be prepared for difficulties throughout the whole process. To begin, the addict may not even agree with you, or anyone else, that there is an actual problem. This will make it harder for them to want to change. They may also feel awkward and embarrassed talking to you or even a professional about the issue. They may also worry about the consequences of admitting that they have an addiction. For example, if they are a functioning addict with a job they enjoy, they will likely worry about being found out and losing their job.
There really is no easy way to help a person who is dealing with an addiction. The best scenario is that they want to get help themselves and come to you for help. However, if that isn’t the case, then trying to convince them to do so may or may not work. It may even push them further away. However, there are a few steps you can take that may push them in the right direction.
Make Sure They Trust You
No one will want to lean on a person that they cannot trust, even an addict. It is important that your loved one understands that they can trust you during their time of need and that you will be there for them. Remember, they are human beings who have gotten themselves into a bad situation. Don’t make it worse by constantly yelling at them and criticizing everything they do. Refrain from long lectures and nagging. Let them know that even though you disapprove of their addiction, you still love and care for them as a person.
Don’t Engage in Risky Behaviors Yourself
While you are trying to help a loved one battle an addiction, it is best to avoid any kind of addictive behavior yourself. Sure, you may be able to drink in moderation, but that just sends the message to the addict that you are a hypocrite. They may not trust you enough to let you help them if they think you are an addict as well. Put any risky behaviors on the back burner while you help your loved one overcome their addiction.
Allow Yourself Help
It can be unbelievably stressful helping a loved one overcome an addiction. Many people often put so much time and energy into someone else that they don’t take the time to care for themselves. It’s okay to back off and care for your own needs during the process. Experts also recommend that family and friends of addicts join support groups, such as Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous.
After Treatment Begins
The actual treatment process can vary greatly depending on the type of addiction treatment your loved one receives. Remember, they still need you while they are in rehab, whether it is an inpatient or an outpatient center. Talk to them about what their addiction has done to you, in an open and loving way. Don’t humiliate them or criticize their actions while they are in therapy. You want them to understand how it has been for you in a non-threatening way.
Always have an open mind once they are in therapy. As time goes on, feelings may come out that you are not expecting. Your loved one may even blame a lot of their issues on you if you are very close to them. Don’t immediately become defensive about this if it happens. If you truly want them to get better, you will need to be open about your role in their lives. If they see that you are willing to accept and change some things about yourself, your loved one will also be more willing to change.
Change does not happen quickly when it comes to addiction. While your loved one is in treatment, do your best to be as loving and patient as possible.
